\n by JunoMagic
\n Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives-ShareAlike license<\/small><\/p>\n
\nTroll<\/h3>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcIt was bad enough when he was merely collecting tractors. I mean, I ask you!<\/p>\n\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcA whole shed full of tractors from the 1940s, 1950s, 1960s. Noisy, dirty, ugly things.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcAnd he was constantly in the shed, tinkering, and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153working\u00e2\u20ac\u009d them. He always came back covered in … substances. No, not just oil. I KNOW how to get oil out of fabrics and off faces.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcIt’s like being married to a five-year-old with rather overgrown toys.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcExactly.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcAnd now, he has a troll.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcYes.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcA troll.
\n \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcT-R-O-L-L.’<\/p>\n\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcNo. No pink hairs.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcYes, very big feet.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcNo, not at all cute.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcHmm?’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcWell, you’re not believing a word of this as it is, so I guess I might just as well tell you the whole story.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcIt’s some idiot wizard’s fault. Yes, wizard. No, no hat, no hat trick, no rabbits. At least none that I know of. The troll is partial to sheep, the older and stringier the better.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcWell, apparently – as far as the troll can tell, anyway – the wizard messed up. Yes. Very much like your lawyer.\u00c2\u00a0 Absolutely. I can give you the number of our lawyer. Yes.\u00c2\u00a0 She’s good. At least she got back at that fuckwit for us that broke off the side mirror of our car. Anyway. The wizard used a spell on the troll. Yes, of course it was the wrong spell. How did you know? \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Oh. <\/em>Yes, of course. I always get the wrong number in such situations, too.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dc…so instead of saying “as long as THE earth will exist”, the wizard says “as long as this piece of earth remains”. Yes. There’s an artificial lake there now. Exactly.<\/em> Dam, water reservoir, the works. And a very wet troll. Yeah. He woke. Wet.’<\/em><\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcNo, I must say, considering the circumstances he’s rather sweet.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcHe offered me a flower.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcOf course he also takes up one shed all of his own.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcMy husband? Wants another one. No, not a shed. I wish. No, no, I don’t think <\/em>he means to take them apart. At least I hope not.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcThe worst part? When wet, they smell.’<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u02dcMmmmkay. You’re right. Dogs do, too.’<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
<\/p>\nSong of the day:<\/strong><\/p>\n
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