{"id":10892,"date":"2014-01-27T10:38:10","date_gmt":"2014-01-27T09:38:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/?page_id=10892"},"modified":"2014-01-29T15:22:50","modified_gmt":"2014-01-29T14:22:50","slug":"something-i-ought-to-do","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/junofanfic\/various-fandoms\/the-notebook\/something-i-ought-to-do","title":{"rendered":"Something I Ought To Do"},"content":{"rendered":"

Song for this chapter: <\/b> \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It All Disappears\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (Bone Poets Orchestra)<\/a><\/p>\n

\"chapter<\/p>\n

Something I Ought To Do<\/h3>\n

A few days later, Chris hid away from the world and the filming of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Horrible Bosses 2\u00e2\u20ac\u009d with sandwiches and salad and Smart Water. Somehow each premiere seemed a worse kind of hell than all previous ones rolled into one. It didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really help to have days on set thrown into the mix. Once again he was tempted to run away. Away from the circus and the chaos. To lock himself up in an ivory tower somewhere. But of course that was not an option. He was in two major franchises now, he was involved in several smaller projects at various stages of completion, and had some great and exciting stuff lined up. And if he smiled hard enough when he looked in the mirror while telling himself how great<\/i> and how exciting<\/i> it all was, maybe he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d believe it.<\/p>\n

Then he realized he had no book or newspaper to keep himself entertained for lunch. When he patted down his jacket, he realized that he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d also forgotten his phone. Clearly, it was one of those days. There was just that damn notebook.<\/i><\/p>\n

Succumbing to boredom (or perhaps rather sordid curiosity), he flipped it open again, right in the middle.<\/p>\n

\n

Where love rules, there is no will to power, and where power predominates, love is lacking. The one is the shadow of the other.<\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Again, he found himself frowning at the quote. His relationship with Iris \u00e2\u20ac\u201c well, arrangement, really \u00e2\u20ac\u201c was over and done with, and he regretted that more than he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d anticipated. She had been such a good sport about it. Less of a hassle than most models he knew. Fun and European. Adventurous, in bed and outside of bed (she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d even suggested pegging, but of course they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d never gotten around to actually trying that).<\/p>\n

His publicist was already pestering him about dates again, but he really wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t in the mood for another \u00e2\u20ac\u0153agreement\u00e2\u20ac\u009d with a model or an up-and-coming actress. And he couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even remember the last time he met a woman he was genuinely interested in. Someone with the sense of humor and the kind of intelligence he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d still be able to appreciate years down the road. He drowned a sigh in a glass of Smart Water. Somehow he thought he knew less about love than ever. He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d definitely never been in a relationship where love ruled<\/i>. Fun, yes. Common sense and convenience, sure. Power … A strange feeling stirred in his stomach as he imagined how power might be expressed in a relationship. For some reason (probably because of the inevitable Sylar connection) he had to think of Zach. Not of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Heroes\u00e2\u20ac\u009d, though. He thought of Zach\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s eyes. Of his pictures in Tyler\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s latest book. Of his perfectly controlled intensity. Chris had spent too much time looking at those photos.<\/p>\n

Shivering, Chris hastily turned the page.<\/p>\n

\n

# The Love Song of the North American Douchebag<\/b><\/p>\n

# It happens like this<\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

He snorted. Okay, that<\/i> he could identify with. Though, hashtags? Did that mean the writer had copied the lines from Twitter? The lines definitely looked like something Zach would Tweet. Well, minus the capital letters, of course. Because upper case was so establishment. And lower case was so progressive. (But there was no punctuation, and just to be even more contrary, Zach was rather particular about correct punctuation.)<\/p>\n

Chris looked at the next page. Another quote, or rather: parts of a quote. Though this time in the upper half of the page. And, he noted with a strange mixture of satisfaction and relief, he recognized the source at a glance.<\/p>\n

\n

don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t stop now\/his fingers rode my fingers<\/b> as my hand went over the paper\/like nothing else in my life up to now\/you got it\/something I ought to do\/really something<\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Raymond Carver, <\/i>he thought. Collected Stories, The Cathedral. Minus correct capitalization, complete sentences, <\/i>and proper punctuation.<\/i> Berkeley was good for something after all. Also, he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d always liked that particular story. Prose like that, it was more than mere words. There was music<\/i> to language like that. Melody. Something that tugged at your heartstrings like a song.<\/p>\n

\n

not common, but essential<\/b><\/p>\n

(i would pick mind melds 2
all that bonding stuff)<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Was that another quote? Or a comment? Well, the remark in parentheses was definitely <\/i>a comment, and it finally told him something about the owner of the notebook. He felt almost annoyed, and disappointed. Just another Star Trek fan. Also, a Star Trek fan<\/i>? Quoting Carver? That just didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t seem right. Of course an action hero actor recognizing fragments of Carver at a glance probably didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make much sense, either.<\/p>\n

Mind melds, though. He wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t mind them. In the privacy of his own thoughts he could admit that. A mind meld would mean excruciating intimacy and grueling honesty. And if he had this kind of courage, to expose himself to another\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s investigation like that, who knew where he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d be right now? For some reason \u00e2\u20ac\u201c probably just because of the Trek connection \u00e2\u20ac\u201c he thought of Zach again. For all his friend\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s esoteric jungle experiences and his grand talk about authenticity and self-discovery, Chris was pretty sure that Zach would rather burn all his fug hats in a big, public bonfire than submit willingly to a mind meld. Why that thought depressed him, Chris had no idea.<\/p>\n

Shaking his head, he put the notebook away and concentrated on his lunch instead. That was healthier. And a lot saner.<\/p>\n

\n

Author\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Notes<\/b><\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u0153The Love Song of the North American Douchebag\u00e2\u20ac\u009d refers to the story with the same title by gyzym<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It Happens Like This\u00e2\u20ac\u009d refers to the story with the same title by labeledbones<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 The fragments of Carver are a textual allusion to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153A Passage That Sings\u00e2\u20ac\u009d by Rave<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u00a2 \u00e2\u20ac\u0153not common but essential\u00e2\u20ac\u009d refers to the mind meld story with the same title by preromantics<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u00c2\u00ab<\/a> \u00e2\u2122\u00a5 \u00c2\u00bb<\/a><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Song for this chapter: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It All Disappears\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (Bone Poets Orchestra) Something I Ought To Do A few days later, Chris hid away from the world and the filming of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Horrible Bosses 2\u00e2\u20ac\u009d with sandwiches and salad and Smart Water. Somehow … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":194,"featured_media":0,"parent":10872,"menu_order":2,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"chapter.php","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-10892","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/10892","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/194"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10892"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/10892\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10931,"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/10892\/revisions\/10931"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/10872"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/juno-magic.fancrone.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10892"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}